“God, examine me and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
24 See if there is any bad thing in me.
Lead me on the road to everlasting life.”
Psalm 138:23-24, NCV
“Examine me | Test me | See me | Lead me.” When we think about an examination, we are never happy or relaxed about it. In our thinking an examination could mean the exposure of weakness. And that is exactly what we want to avoid. Funny though, the psalmist puts himself under the microscope. He invites full disclosure, he anticipates God’s x-ray machine. He wants it.
But his life isn’t perfect or complete. There are fears, and anxieties laying deep inside his heart. Many times this would divide us, and split us from Him. Anxiety will often become a strong wall, that would grow into an issue of some significance. The psalmist moves into God’s presence. So much in him had to be extracted. Understanding that the Father is incredibly aware of us is only the first step.
Examine me | Test me | See me | Lead me. Four words that we must get to know. The Christian life “pivots” on these four words. The four brought together, get dynamically linked into our hearts. These four concepts will become quite critical as we come closer to Him. There is a synergy, when the elements of discipleship are mixed together. For example, if we extract “the examine me” part of this equation, we will not be able to conclude the situations we face very effectively.
I once made a couple loaves of bread where I mistakenly substituted sugar instead of flour. I was frustrated because the lump of dough, was not responding. So what did I do? I added more “flour” which was really powered sugar, from the unmarked canister. Later, what I buried in the backyard was a big lump of something that would never, ever work. Not even if I wished it very hard.
Discipleship must always be intimacy at its a basic level.
That takes God examining my life, full disclosure of everything. We need to be intimate, by being astonishingly open to Him. The things we share will be confidential. And it will also be essential. “May it be the real me who encounters the real You.”