The Epiphany of the Red Shoes

My Red Shoes
My Red Shoes

A few weeks ago, my morning routine had taken me outside on our deck.  I just sat and was soaking up the first rays and drinking a cup of coffee.  My mind usually flits about; and I think about many different things.  I’d like to say that at least some are engaged with challenging issues.  But most though are a bit strange and out of bounds.  It seems at times to be like trying to put a leash on a wild dog.

Sitting there on a deck chair, I thought about the shoes I was wearing.  They were black clogs and I wore them everywhere.  I’ve had them for four or five years.  They had liners, so I could even wear them during winter.  As I sat there, it occurred to me that I have always bought and worn either black, or brown shoes.  Always.  As I considered this preference, it struck me as odd.  Why did I always buy dull and ordinary shoes?

I knew right then that I must buy red shoes!

Out back in the recesses of my mind, a thought burst into my thinking, it was like fireworks just went off.  I would buy red shoes!  I would retire my faithful sandals and wear red ones instead.  I set down my coffee cup and headed for my laptop.  I ordered a comfortable pair of Crocs, in crimson red.

I waited for the postman like a child waits for Christmas. 

I was energized by the thought of having red shoes.  I do a lot of things spontaneously.  I can be far too impulsive, and it usually gets me in trouble.  But when they arrived, they were even better then I expected.  I put them on and started to prance around the house.  And to see a 62 year old man acting like a ten year old must have been a sight.  I didn’t want to take them off, and later I even flitted with the idea of even wearing them to bed.

Wearing my new red shoes was a profound experience which I didn’t anticipate. It may seem weird but when I wear them the feeling is somewhat like falling in love, or at least a reasonable facsimile.  Perhaps if its nothing, I’m willing to accept that.

I think of God’s grace and how extraordinary it is.

We can reside in a barren wasteland of a tedious existence where joy is seldom found. I know this is true. But there can be an infusion of mercy in such places. A grace that meets with us and alters us. I believe we are to be “grace blasted” believers living with a sense of wonder over the kindness of God. He has chosen us to be His own sons and daughters.

“And I will be your Father, and you will be my sons and daughters, says the Lord Almighty.”

2 Corinthians 6:18

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Darkness Hovers, A Simple Poem

I believe that this poem is relevant to all who struggle to keep depression at bay. It was originally posted at my blog, Linda Kruschke’s Blog.

There are people in this world who seem to always be upbeat and to think positively about things. Darkness seems far from them. But for some of us, that is not the case, and darkness hover ever closer. The armor of God holds for us the essential weapons of Light as the darkness hovers ever closer to our doors.

Darkness Hovers

Darkness hovers at the door
eye out for an entrance
an opening in my armor
a reason to steal my joy

The joy of the Lord
is my strength and my armor
the Light that keeps
darkness at bay

Despair lurks in the shadows
waiting for an opportunity
to pull me back into darkness
with hopes of keeping me evermore

Vigilance is crucial
I never can forget
Darkness desires to consume me
and take my joy away

I must stand firm
in the armor of my Lord
His belt of truth
reminding me He is my Light

Flaming arrows of sorrow
guilt, shame, and despair
fly from the darkness
my heart and soul their target

With the shield of faith
darkness is thwarted
unless I grow careless
even for a moment

I grow weary and tired
pain overwhelms me
My shield falls to the ground
darkness overcomes

Yet my Savior never forsakes
this despair will not last
Though I am in darkness
I will pray in the Spirit

Light returns to my soul
I set my armor to the ready
once again standing vigilant
as darkness hovers at my door

“The night is far spent; the day is at hand. Let us therefore cast off the works of darkness, and let us put on the armor of light.”

Romans 13:12

Loneliness is Real

“I lie awake; I am like a lonely sparrow on the housetop.

Psalm 102:7, ESV 

 “At my first defense no one came to stand by me, but all deserted me. May it not be charged against them!”

   2 Timothy 4:1

The Bible is very sensitive and its aware of the difficulties of loneliness.

We discover that the sense of being all alone is quite common. We’ll encounter this awful thing before our day is done.  To be alone, isolated, and separated brings us a ‘solitary confinement‘ of our hearts.  That difficult confinement will never be easy.

There’s a place where the Lord orders us to be quarantined.

Sometimes, in order to deal with certain sins, our Father will purposefully isolate us from others. Believe it or not, your sinful attitudes can spread to others. Sin is often compared to spiritual leprosy. I have seen this and have experienced it for myself.

But loneliness doesn’t have to be a sin issue. (Although it often is.) Being lonely can be a season in your life; like winter is waiting for spring. This is a hard time to be sure. The field seems dead, fallow, and waits for planting seed. Ministry is not really easy during this season. It seems like a time of preparation.

Both David and Paul were often lonely. 

King David looked around and found nobody that he could be with.  He felt like a solitary bird when all had flown away, and the apostle Paul knew true abandonment.  Everyone had left him by himself in this difficult spot. The reality is, we need others.  And often, too often, this is when this is withheld from us, and we’re somewhat vulnerable.

Jesus knew what it was like to be terribly lonely. 

“You will leave me alone, but I am never really alone because the Father is with me”  (read John 16).  I often think He spent all that time in prayer, to somehow connect with His Father was because of loneliness.  It seems Jesus had a deep need to be understood.

Your loneliness can be redeemed and used by God.

It very often can spur us into a deeper awareness of the Spirit’s work.  The only way I can describe it as a point of abandonment or isolation, but it also brings us to a sense of His deep love for us. 

Loneliness is one of our Lord’s favorite tools in restoring our hard hearts.  It has a wonderful capacity to do things in us, that none of His other ways would work.  It can be the perfect mechanism for Him to deeply touch us.  And He will not hesitate to use it.

Often there can be a definite loneliness as we move toward Him. 

This is acquired loneliness that comes when we start separating ourselves from the world.  Few or any will understand you, or why you are doing this.  To follow Jesus, is to become like Him.  If He struggled at times with loneliness, so will you.

I have nothing at all to say to those who want to escape this bitter misery. 

I can say no ‘magic words’ that will lift you out of this pain. Sometimes you just might have to plow it through it on your own.  But I can tell you that He is wildly and passionately in love with you. You are never alone. Never.

If everyone forsakes you and leaves you standing alone in a tight spot, He will be there.

“For He Himself has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.”  

Hebrews 13:5

Praying From a Dark Pit

“I waited patiently for the Lord to help me,
    and he turned to me and heard my cry.
He lifted me out of the pit of despair,
    out of the mud and the mire.
He set my feet on solid ground
    and steadied me as I walked along.”

3″He has given me a new song to sing,
    a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see what he has done and be amazed.
    They will put their trust in the Lord.”

Psalms 40:1-3, NLT

Psalm 40 is jam packed with great and wonderful truth. It contains freedom for the Christian– a way out for the broken believer. We do well when we use it, and that’s what it’s there for. The deep pit has been used over many centuries as the way God teaches us to sing certain songs. But that doesn’t make it easier, does it?

Verse 1

I waited patiently for the Lord to help me, and he turned to me and heard my cry.

Waiting is a critical word, it should not be regarded as perfunctory or a trivial word. In our daily walk we must be patiently seeking the Lord, that comes first. Admitting you need help is the first step. And guess what? You need help. :-)

The word ‘wait’ is special, it’s kawvah in Hebrew. It can mean ‘to bind together by twisting.‘ It can be used with the idea of braiding strands of rope together. It is never a passive act that just happens. Waiting on God is to be done with intentional purpose.

Remember that the Lord is not some distant deity on a hill far away.

He is closer to you than you think. He is responsive and aware. He hears your cries and wants to act; He is not deaf, but our patience is critical. Waiting on Him is crucial to being free. We must bind and twist our hearts and live our life to His desires.

Verse 2

He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and the mire. He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along.

The seeable terrain can be awful. There are muddy paths and mucky pits. Things that pull you down and suck you in. They’ll trap the traveler. But the Holy Spirit is quite able to lift us out. He picks us up and secures us. He uses the rope of God’s Word.

He is way more willing to save us, than we are to being saved.

Solid ground is where we are meant to be. It’s become a place of firm standing and secure footing. He makes us steady and He keeps us safe. The Holy Spirit now has intimate care over your soul.

Verse 3-4

“He has given me a new song to sing, a hymn of praise to our God.

Many will see what he has done and be amazed. They will put their trust in the Lord.

Some of the greatest songs are the ones that come from those just delivered from the pit. These ‘pit songs’ are offered to God from sincere and true hearts that have once been trapped. There’s something solid heard from the hearts of those redeemed from disaster.

These songs no longer sound religious or contrived.

“YOU CAN SEE GOD FROM ANYWHERE IF YOUR MIND IS SET TO LOVE AND OBEY HIM.”

A.W. Tozer

From our deepest pits come our greatest praises.

There is a passionate quality that saturates these ‘pit praises’ that is highly treasured by God, and esteemed and valued by the Church– a sense of authenticity starts to be finally heard. We can finally start to see that our pits become ‘launching pads’ of true songs of deliverance.

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