Tag: Psalms

A Room in His House

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“What a beautiful home, God-of-the-Angel-Armies!I’ve always longed to live in a place like this,Always dreamed of a room in your house,where I could sing for joy to God-alive!”
    

    
“Birds find nooks and crannies in your house,sparrows and swallows make nests there.They lay their eggs and raise their young,singing their songs in the place where we worship.God-of-the-Angel-Armies! King! God!How blessed they are to live and sing there!”
    

    

    

 Psalm 84:1-4, Message

There are some things that leave an indelible mark, and they go down very deep and penetrate our souls.  I remember that I was staying at Simpson College on Silver Ave. in San Francisco in June 1986.  The dorms were empty and I had a whole floor to myself.  The campus was gorgeous; the rose bushes were in full bloom.

I found a little “mom and pop” corner market nearby which had an awesome deli. Here I could buy cold cuts, some excellent braunschweiger, and freshly baked sourdough bread. I returned to my room to build my sandwich, and feast.

I remember that the windows had opened and there was a beautiful breeze.   Food, warm sun, flowers in bloom, and the Holy Spirit was about to ‘plow’ into my life. It would be a holy collision.

I didn’t realize it at the time.

It was simply something that I captured and savored.  I wasn’t fully aware of the moment, but I would grasp it later.

And yet everything seemed to coincide, it was magical in the best, and in the holiest sense of the word.  It was beautiful, that is all I can say.  That time in that dorm room has become a crystalline moment that I will never forget.  Right then and there, I fell in love, not with a girl, but with a profound moment in time and place.

I knew I was on holy ground. I should have taken off my shoes. I was in His presence. It was profound. It was real. And I did nothing to deserve it.

That same nostalgia lays thick on the shoulders of the writer of Psalm 84. 

He remembers and savors those powerful memories of his visit to the temple.  He was given something at that particular moment that would follow him for the rest of his life. He dared not think differently. And honestly, he couldn’t.

The beauty of that experience was inviolable and true and could never be duplicated.  This treasure was his. As he aged he could tell his grandchildren, “I walked with God.” And he really meant it. He finally understood that moment. It was were he met God.

I personally believe God gives us these holy moments, which are wrapped in wonder and awe.  And when the Holy Spirit deeply touches you in this way you will never, ever be the same again. 

The writer of this psalm has the same hunger for God. 

These moments in the temple which are so blessed have also ‘ruined’ him.   Often special times of God’s presence will result in a ‘sanctified’ dissatisfaction with the present status quo.

Dostoevsky once wrote, “Those who have the disease called Jesus will never be cured.” You can easily apply it to these verses in Psalm 84.  God’s presence in some supernatural sense,”ruins” us forever, and really nothing else can ever compare.

When we finally make our way to Jesus, our life often takes on a special and curious wonder.  When the rain finally comes to the barren desert, an explosion of life bursts out.  In much the same way, our lives are ‘watered’ by Jesus. Things get very green and lush as we live in the Spirit.  All of this is in contrast to our dry and desperate life without His presence. There isn’t any comparison.

I want to become hungry for His presence. 

I so want to be in the center of wherever He is at.  I admit that His grace and love has spoiled me.  But the love of Jesus does this.  Normal life seems to be nothing more than a boring journey into ‘black & white,’ but somehow He turns it all into stunning color.

The psalmist practically begs to be returned to the temple.  He wants to be there, more than anything else. It is now his true home. He will not be satisfied with anything less.

I beg of you, do not lose what He shows you. Don’t trade it away, don’t barter. What He gives is meant for you. Very few can understand. But you will.

I think I understand now.
I say to the Lord, “You are my Lord.Apart from you, I have nothing good.”
    

Psalm 16:2

 

Living With Chronic Pain

Chronic Pain

Sometimes we live in darkness. We suffer and it’s hard. We mentally accept God’s grace and His love for us, but in our heart we remain untouched. Pain saturates everything it seems. We seem to go through the motions, but deep down we’re convinced that we’ll never find the light that so many claim to have.

Have we been cursed?

Pain fills our life. We live with something that is persistent, and our hope is a day when it’s all over. Psalm 88 is our Psalm. Nothing is sugar-coated. It is raw and unabridged. It’s pain under a microscope. That Psalm is yours.

For my soul is full of troubles,

    and my life draws near to Sheol.

I am counted among those who go down to the pit;

    I am a man who has no strength,

Psalm 88:3-4

I love you,

Bryan

Walking the Wire Again

I hope everybody can find a little flame
Me, I say my prayers,
then just light myself on fire
and walk out on the wire once again.”  

Counting Crows, “Goodnight Elizabeth”

Hope is a powerful thing— nothing compares. It truly is the ‘anchor of the soul.’ Without it, life would be hopeless, and that is intolerable to a human being.

We will implode without hope. The psalmist was well aware of this tendency; he speaks to himself about this. He ‘talks to himself’ which can seem a little weird to some.

“Why are you discouraged, my soul?
    Why are you so restless?
        Put your hope in God,
            because I will still praise him.
                He is my savior and my God.”

Psalm 42:11

Day-to-day life can be arduous. Sometimes faith falters and hopelessness becomes a real and deadly option. For those of us with debilitating illnesses this can be significant hazard. Depression can severely hinder us.

The writer of Psalm 42 understood this. Discouragement was a real issue, especially when he wondered what was swirling around him. (And I daresay he is not alone in this.)

He insists a certitude. He refuses to give in to the idea that failure is final. He will not allow himself to accept the finality of hopelessness. He will not surrender himself to this idea that ‘all is lost.’ The way he battles back is seen in an inner conversation with his soul. He speaks to himself directly concerning the great faithfulness of God to his situation.

It is real, it’s definitely not fluff. He operates in reality. He can’t pretend that the feeling of despondency is imaginary, it is far too cruel and real for it not to be.

However having a hope will cement me in the goodness and mercy of God. It is the sterling silver (.925) belief that He cares for me. The verse in 42:11 ties in with praise and worship. This is not a minor thing. When we praise, we break the bonds of hopelessness, in a way that our souls can know, and appreciate. It decisively disarms the depression, and fills the embattled soul with hope.

Pain can be a powerful indicator of depression unchecked. But hope changes the manner of which we live.

“Every Christian who struggles with depression struggles to keep their hope clear.

“There is nothing wrong with the object of their hope – Jesus Christ is not defective in any way whatsoever. But the view from the struggling Christian’s heart of their objective hope could be obscured by disease and pain, the pressures of life, and by Satanic fiery darts shot against them.”

–John Piper

I wish you the best even as the battle intensifies. Jesus is enough. Look around, see Him and run right to Him. Your faith will hold you.

Deep Waters

“The soul’s deepest thirst is for God Himself, who has made us so that we can never be satisfied without Him.”

     F.F. Bruce

I wrote a simple poem that I hope will bless:

Tears and sorrow overwhelmed me
day after day after week after year
No relief in sight as hopelessness
appeared to win and then

He drew me out of
deep waters

Each day presents a new challenge
or the same challenge never ending
And I feel like I’m drowning
in evasion and falsehood but

He draws me out of
deep waters

Tedium is like rising water
and I’m not that tall so
it’s sure to be over my head
eventually and yet

He draws me out of
deep waters

New loss reminds of past loss
and grief changes but never goes away
floods emotion unexpectedly
till I’m drowning and then

He draws me out of
deep waters

And in the end I soar above
the deep waters in faith
knowing He will always
draw me out

I love you so much, even though I’ve never met you.

Linda K.

My site can be found at AnotherFearlessYear.net