Category: depression

Seeing Things from Both Sides

“The Great Depression” Sandstorm

There was a time when I was in the midst of major depression that I believed that surviving that deep darkness was the hardest thing I would ever do. And it was a great struggle. It was especially difficult to comprehend when people would say things like, “If you didn’t want to be depressed you wouldn’t be.” Or they would say, “Just snap out of it and be happy.” As if being depressed was a conscious choice when I knew that it was not.

In retrospect I can see that to some extent my depression was the result of conscious choices, but I had no idea those choices would lead me to the pit of darkness and despair. Once there, I still could not see that it had been my choices that brought me there and I was not able without the help of God to see my way out.

Yes, I once thought the pit of depression was the worst place I could ever be. But I have recently come to realize that there is another place that is, if not worse, at least as bad as being depressed. That place is standing beside a family member or loved one who is caught in the stranglehold of this terrible condition of the mind and soul, and not being able to help.

There is more than one person in my life right now who is struggling as I once did to be free of the darkness of depression. I long to simply reach in and pull them out, but I can’t. Having seen things from the other side, I do at least know what NOT to say, but I don’t always know what to say or do. I understand their pain and their struggle, and it hurts to see them in that place of despair and hopelessness that I once traveled.

Why do I share this observation? Because I want you who are suffering from depression to understand that your loved ones mean well and want what is best for you. Seeing you in pain and hopelessness is difficult for them, too.

The problem is they simply do not know what to do. We who are on the outside can pray and offer encouragement, but only God can truly rescue you from the pit and pull you from the depths of despair. Only our Savior Jesus offers the hope of Light eternal that will shine into the darkness and show you the way out.

I can tell you about how He shone His Light into my darkness and revealed the choices that led me there, but my experience and my choices may not be the same as yours. Only God sees into the heart of a person to know what healing they require. It is only the hope that Jesus brings that makes seeing the pain of a loved one struggling with depression bearable.

The people walking in darkness
have seen a great light;
on those living in the land of deep darkness
a light has dawned.

Isaiah 9:2 (NIV).

Find Linda’s Home Page : http://lindakruschke.wordpress.com/
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Christian, Where is Your Umbrella?

Sometime ago there was a town which had experienced a prolonged and difficult drought. There was no water to be found for crops and livestock, and hardly enough for the people of this once prosperous village.

There was nothing to be done, and is often the case the town fathers finally turned to the churches for help. This usually happens when no other solution can be found.

 The pastors met and after much discussion came to a decision on a course of action. They decided to call together the people of faith to come in one place and beseech God to send rain. The thinking was if they could get all the people in a single spot, and if all of them combined their prayer, God might move, and turn on the spigots of heaven.

 A time was set and promptly announced throughout the town. The pastors requested that everyone who gathered at the town square should bring with them some item of devotion. When everyone gathered–en masse, they filled the square to overflowing. The pastors were amazed and blessed, not only by the great turnout but by all the crosses and crucifixes, the icons, the rosaries and Bibles that the people brought with them.

 At the appointed end of this gathering, the speaker implored the Lord for mercy. In that very moment, it started to thunder. All of a sudden, it began to rain. The people shouted, and waved their crosses and beads, and their holy books. Some danced and leaped for joy. In the middle of the crowd, one item held up by a nine year old boy gripped the attention of everyone. He lifted up his umbrella.

………………

 I honestly don’t know if this story actually happened. But I do know faith is a powerful thing. It is that utter confidence that God is going to do something, and then being rewarded when it actually happens.

As people who struggle with mental disorders or other chronic illnesses, we need to know that our God is alive and that he wants to get involved in our lives. Those family and friends who support us also need that assurance.

 We must approach God by faith (Hebrews 11:1) and believe is going to reward us (v. 6). Being a person of faith is to be audacious and daring. It is to live life as if it were an adventure of faith. You may continue to be ill and struggle, but you will live life bold and free.

ybic, Bryan

 

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Pain and Prayer in Poetry

This poem is an acrostic of sorts. When I originally wrote it I titled it Prayer, but the acrostic letters that begin each stanza spell PAIN. It was written at a time I was in a lot of physical and emotional pain, and found that prayer was the best way to find relief, if not physically at least mentally and emotionally.

Prayer

Prayer finds me
seeking You for
comfort and healing
here on my knees

As I come to You
my mind is turned
to others who need
what I seek for me

Immanuel, You
are with me now
as I focus on You
instead of my pain

Never to forsake me
You have promised
I find it is true
when You I seek

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The Scream

You’re probably familiar with Edvard Munch’s painting The Scream— yesterday it sold at auction for 120 million dollars. It is a profound painting, but do you know its inspiration? From the venerable Wikipedia, a quote from Munch’s own diary, written January 22, 1892:

“I was walking along a path with two friends—the sun was setting—suddenly the sky turned blood red—I paused, feeling exhausted, and leaned on the fence—there was blood and tongues of fire above the blue-black fjord and the city—my friends walked on, and I stood there trembling with anxiety—and I sensed an infinite scream passing through nature.”

“… an infinite scream passing through nature.”  That’s quite terrifying.  With this message, from those who know how things shall be.  We have to realize that ‘The Scream’ is a manifestation of a hellvalot of emptiness and confusion.  Once understood, we will try to move forward.  But the image of a man screaming on a pier, has ‘cut the nerve’ of our attempts to move ahead.

‘The Scream’ is like a razor blade, that is wielding an agenda that opens us up, and drives us to this place of desperation.  Rather than turn from the pain, we turn to the place where “we think we understand”.  But the panic and frightfulness are not easily subtracted out of our lives.  We try to advance, but are shackled by our own confusion.

Looking at this painting, we can identify with the ‘frozenness’ of the image.  We turn in refusal, for we understand the darkness.  We come to the place that we fully intend to open ourselves up.  But the captivity of our hearts becomes open and something that is available and accessible. It seems the ‘horror’ has an influence on our mental health.

‘The Scream’  becomes to be incredibly predictive.  Any strength we might have has become empty and hollow, we are left with confusion and disorientation.  The emptiness and desperation of being alone on the pier, puts us in a sense of lostness.  But this painting can lead us to God.  Jesus has taken our horror and absorbed it in Himself.

 

ybic, Bryan

 

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