Tag: repentance

God Must Hear Your Heart

 

There are different ways God uses to hear your heart. Your voice, actions and attitudes are all subject to His evaluation and analysis. He is continually watching us. He uses His divine stethoscope to know us.

“Yet even now,” declares the Lord,
    “return to me with all your heart,
with fasting, with weeping, and with mourning;
13     and rend your hearts and not your garments.”
Return to the Lord your God,
    for he is gracious and merciful,
slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love;
    and he relents over disaster.
14 Who knows whether he will not turn and relent,
    and leave a blessing behind him,”

Joel 2:12-14

The Old Testament prophet Joel is also interested in the human heart. His words make that a central issue. He diminishes the outward that doesn’t include the inward. (Unfortunately, it is easier “to be seen” rather than “to be.“)

“Rend your hearts and not your garments.”

This is God’s very real word to a wayward people. To “rend” means to tear and it is perhaps the most critical attribute for a wayward heart.

I’m convinced that we must learn what it means to repent everyday. It is never completely done–never once and then you’re finished with it.

We also seem to have this strange tendency to reduce repentance to outward actions. We however must stress the inward rather than the outward. We must go deeper, and take repentance right down to the deepest core.

True repentance must go as deep as you can go, and be truly proven before we claim a victory.

God desires to hear your heart. The Holy Spirit is going to insist on it. (But He will also be a loving Guide.)

“Blessed are those who mourn [especially them], for they shall be comforted.”

Matthew 5:4, Emphasis mine

“To do so no more is the truest repentance.” —Martin Luther

 

Self-Destruction

“For whoever finds me finds life
and receives favor from the Lord.
But those who miss me injure themselves.
All who hate me love death.”  

Proverbs 8:35-36

“There are seeds of self-destruction in all of us that will bear only unhappiness if allowed to grow.”  Dorothea Brande 

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“If one looks with a cold eye at the mess man has made of history, it is difficult to avoid the conclusion that he has been afflicted by some built-in mental disorder which drives him towards self-destruction.”   Arthur Koestler 

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 Among people with a mental illness, there is a sort of impulsivity, and in advanced cases we can see a ‘self-destructive behavior‘.  We do things, superficially we recognize and even assert that it is detrimental, but we will continue to do it regardless.  Those ‘in the know around us’ can’t believe what we are doing. It is totally irrational.

Bipolar, schizophrenia, and many other mental illnesses have impulsivity as a common aspect of their disease processes.

  • We drink,
  • do drugs,
  • do pornography, strippers
  • steal from our friends,
  • cut ourselves,
  • misuse our credit cards (and go deeply in debt)
  • get crazy at rock concerts,
  • and much more.

We are impulsive and we do things that a healthy person would never do.  We consistently choose the worst things and we can’t seem to stop ourselves.

We are the ‘wild children,’ we just seem to thrive on the edge of destruction, repeatedly.  This is in spite of the consequences.  We just don’t worry about the side-effects of our choices.  We don’t think ahead, all we think is of the moment.  We consistently choose what is really bad for us, and then throw ourselves headlong into the darkness.  The more we do these terrible things, the wilder it seems to get.

We can’t seem to stop. 

I can say this because I had a personal issue with ‘self-destruction’.  You might say I have a ‘Masters degree’ in it.  I have gotten very proficient at it, and have utilized deception to cover my tracks.  So much of my life is hidden and I seem to float my darkness out in such a way as to diffuse questions and to excuse awful nasty behavior.

Being impulsive/self-destructive is a hard life in many ways. 

We cultivate an image to others that we have really never attained.  We are very good at deception, we have discovered how to do and say what we want without others “getting in our faces.” Being impulsive, ready to step into the most pleasurable darkness, becomes something we must cover up, at all costs.

“Can a man scoop a flame into his lap
    and not have his clothes catch on fire?”

Proverbs 6:27

Am I secretly drinking, doing drugs or using sex (esp. in pornography)?  The impulses that drive us to do this stuff will become the way we experience destruction, but somehow we don’t seem to get it.  The mentally ill have a horrendous rate of alcoholism and addiction.  I’ve seen figures that put us at 80% that have significant issues.  We seem to be ‘self-medicating’ ourselves to escape, or trying to get some stability.

When we come to Jesus, we discover that He loves us completely, including our ‘hidden side’.  His love comes to us without any conditions.  We are free to do whatever we want.  However, we will find that ‘sin accepted’ is very brutal to us.  Smashing out heads against a brick wall, over and over, doesn’t make the wall any softer.  And yet we continue to do the most foolish thing we can do, and then we–  REPEAT.

There is a way out of this.  But few will really do it. 

It’s called ‘public confession.’ We get it out into the open, where the sun shines, and it will be seen exactly for what it is.  We choose not to live out our lives in secretiveness. We must learn the skills of transparency, as we lay out our evil, our deception for the church to see.

When we deceive others, we will end up deceiving ourselves.  We absolutely cannot continue a life in darkness, or in long-term sin. wPeop cover their faults and excuse themselves do not have a repeneir faults and excuse themselves do not have a repentant spirit.

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Messed Up People

Elijah was suicidal. Job wished he had never been born. David understood deep depression. Moses was anxious. Hannah was barren. Jonah was angry. Paul was all alone in a prison cell.

And actually, this is only a brief list. The Bible is loaded with flawed people who stumbled trying to be faithful. God uses imperfect people, because there really isn’t any other kind to be found. And there were others.

Noah got spectacularly drunk. Abraham lied. Jacob repeatedly deceived others. Rahab was a whore. Samson lusted. David committed adultery and was a murderer. Peter denied Christ.

Why does God favor and love people who are so disturbed? Honestly, none of us measure up. It seems He uses the weak to carry out a plan and a purpose of redeeming others, and establishing a Kingdom. He takes messes and gives them His message.

He is Love– 100% of the time, and He loves you, and He loves me, He loves the world. (John 3:16.)

Messed up people of faith become instruments and vessels of grace to other messed up people. We carry a treasure that is not ours. Sometimes it takes years to see this. I hope you can understand this. I hope it doesn’t take long.

And nothing is ever really wasted. Our mistakes (sins) become useful things to Him. For example, David’s sin would be transformed into Psalm 51 and 32. Yes, his disobedience had consequences, I won’t dispute that, but something wonderful also came when he repented.

David paid an awful price for his sin. That disobedience almost destroyed him. Not only did it separate him from God, but his family felt the effects of his evil actions.

Yes, you need to repent. But when sin is destroying you, it does seem you need to turn from it, and leave it now.

The first two verses of Psalm 51 can bring tears when we finally understand their profound beauty, for they came out of David’s personal evil:

Have mercy on me, O God,
    according to your steadfast love;
according to your abundant mercy
    blot out my transgressions.
2 Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity,
    and cleanse me from my sin!

Psalm 53:1-2, ESV

For thousands of years people of real faith have come and drawn beauty and grace from this song. David knew his sin was real, and incredible pain emerged from that, but the Psalm did also.

Please do not try to hide or excuse your sin, it always has the most awful consequences.

Broken people can be forgiven, redeemed and used. Sometimes I think God gets special enjoyment out of picking the worst and patiently loving us to wholeness. If you really know Him, and know your flaws, you’re well on your way of usefulness in His kingdom.

“But we have this treasure in jars of clay, to show that the surpassing power belongs to God and not to us.”

2 Corinthians 4:7

Only Grace Could Pull This Off

“There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.”  

Romans 8:1, ESV

When you start to really read scripture, you’ll soon see this idea that there’s no condemnation for anyone who believes in Jesus Christ.  We’re no longer under a debilitating guilt, God’s own Son has died to bring us home. 

His grace has done all of this, for us.

“31 What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? 32 He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?”  

“Who shall bring any charge against God’s elect? It is God who justifies.” 

Romans 8:31-33, ESV

There is absolutely nothing that can touch us. 

There is no accusation that can come against us.  Our acceptance is total and complete in Christ. A vital faith in His Word has secured our salvation. We have been counted ‘just’–and this is not a clerical mistake!

When we truly repent, and believe we’re given eternal life. He has made us right. And He is waiting for us to respond to this outrageous love.

“Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ.”

Romans 5:1

Any awful thing that could be smeared on us has been carried by Jesus. We gave Him all our sin, and He in turn, calls us just.

He carries us with Him to the cross, with all of our darkness and perversity.  Jesus has become evil so that we might be made good.  He absorbs sin, drawing in all my evil and taking it as His own. 

Maybe this is strange, but I believe Jesus Christ is “God’s sponge.”

This is called justification by faith, and it’s His gift to us.

“For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.”

2 Corinthians 5:21

I struggle with my words here. What in the world is there left to say?  What words can really communicate what has just happened?  Let’s just stop, and think a moment. By faith “it is just as I’ve never sinned.”

That dear one is extraordinarily good news.