Category: depression

Sin Boldly, But Believe in God More Boldly Still

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“If you are a preacher of mercy, do not preach an imaginary but the true mercy. If the mercy is true, you must therefore bear the true, not an imaginary sin. God does not save those who are only imaginary sinners. Be a sinner, and let your sins be strong, but let your trust in Christ be stronger, and rejoice in Christ who is the victor over sin, death, and the world. We will commit sins while we are here, for this life is not a place where justice resides.”

Martin Luther, From the Melanchthon Letter no. 99, 1 August 1521

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Luther is essentially communicating the things that are real to us.  He takes it down to bare wood.  We are given an understanding of this World, an a sense of what we can expect from the hearts of all those who surround us.  Sin is the issue, and we need to accept that from our brothers and sisters.  We should not be surprised when someone we love intentionally blindsides us with their disobedience to God.

Dramatic words, ‘sin boldly’.  We instantly see this as a way to sin, without restraint.  And let’s face it, sinning is fun.  At times perhaps, even a whole lot more pleasure than walking out godliness.  Luther recognized the inevitably of sin.  As fallen people we should accept that fallenness.  We sin, it’s what we do, and we do that very well. And the Lord knows that.

“If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us.”

1 John 1:8

Our ‘religious’ hearts often go into this ‘deception mode.’  We endeavor not give in to the viciousness of sin.  “We will overcome!” And yet we are so infected with sin, and rebellion that we try to minimize the problem.  If the truth be known, we are sick, infested and condemned.  There are no ‘quick fixes’ for us.  Evil runs rampant.  It is the ultimate epidemic.

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Looking at our salvation

“Let your trust in Christ be more boldly still.’  The Lord Jesus has decisively interrupted our lives.  He has wholesale entered into our darkness and sin.  In a way it’s like a ‘roadside’ bomb, and needs a direct intervention of a specialist to disarm it.  As people who are completely saturated with sin, we need a third party to step-in and to save us from all the embedded darkness.

Often there is a sense of boldness when we completely understand our depravity.  We ‘know’ our sin.  For the most part can grasp its deadliness, and its infectiousness.  The Holy Spirit’s ministry is to bring us to this transparent moment when we can see the darkness and harm we’ve caused.  The fact is, that we are to accept this, it’s all true.  We have been this evil and awful to those around us. Most believers would curiously admit that ‘they have sinned more as a believer’ than before they were first saved.

Luther declares a significant point when he tells us ‘to believe in Christ more boldly still’. Simply, our ‘sin’ awareness must never exceed our Christ awareness.  We must have a stronger sense of Jesus’ victory then our sinfulness.  Our confidence, which has taken a hit on our sinfulness, now shouts ‘hallelujah’ at His victory.

“If we claim we have no sin, we are only fooling ourselves and not living in the truth. 9 But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness. 10 If we claim we have not sinned, we are calling God a liar and showing that his word has no place in our hearts.”

1 John 1:8-10, NLT

“You need not fear because sin still plagues you – instead rejoice that by God’s grace you are on a journey toward eternal life and sin will finally fade into the distant past.”

Luther

“May it be the real me, that seeks and finds the real You.”

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Further info, and source:  http://www.scrollpublishing.com/store/Luther-Sin-Boldly.html

http://www.lectionarysermons.com/june_30_02.htm

http://www.internetmonk.com/archive/a-luther-quote-to-wake-up-the-sleepers

Whim-Whams

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“In our family “whim-wham” is code, a defanged reference to any number of moods and psychological disorders, be they depressive, manic, or schizoaffective. Back in the 1970s and ’80s – when they were all straight depression – we called them “dark nights of the soul.” St. John of the Cross’s phrase ennobled our sickness, spiritualized it. We cut God out of it after the manic breaks started in 1986, the year my dad, brother, and I were all committed. Call it manic depression or by its new, polite name, bipolar disorder. Whichever you wish. We stick to our folklore and call it the whim-whams.”

— David Lovelace, Scattershot: My Bipolar Family

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Speaking in code is often our way of communicating to those who are curious. We seldom tell anyone we have bipolar disorder outright. Some of us tried, and failed; we fall back to “I’m just a little blue today,” or the classic, “I’m just woke up on the wrong side of the bed.” We really can be somewhat disingenuous.

All too often these are half-truths that deflect the sticky issues of a mental breakdown. We seek to salvage some kind of dignity, or evade the inevitable stigma that would certainly come if we told the truth. We choose to evade, but at a cost.

I struggle with the stigma of both bipolar disorder and epilepsy. I’m still uncomfortable when others seem uncomfortable with me. So, I have developed a general rule:

Bryan’s Rule #14, “Never reveal your illness, except to qualified people.”

I suppose this adds a layer of personal security. The occasions I have violated this rule have resulted in awkward pauses and odd looks. Afterwards, the relationship changed. It was as if I suddenly sprouted a second head, or something.

As Christian believers, I know we are supposed to walk in the truth. But exactly how truthful am I supposed to be? I’ve always had an iconoclastic streak, and I love stretching the social boundaries of others. Bipolar disorder has been an illness made-to-order for people like me.

Bryan’s Rule #15, “Openness can be a true step toward my healing.”

But it take truth to change. We really need to be honest by bringing things into the light. Obscuring the truth keeps us isolated and distant from others. Will speaking forthrightly about my bipolar disorder be a challenge? Of course. But necessary if I want to heal and cope.

I’m not advocating making a big sign and parading down Main Street. Just to be a bit more honest with others, and ultimately with ourselves. Let’s be comfortable with our own personal “whim-whams.”

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Memories Haunt in the Light

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For many who have struggled with depression, as I have, often suffer from an underlying brokenness that stems from past tragedies that we can’t seem to completely forget. We try to understand why and pray for forgetfulness that never seems to come. But even so, when we know Jesus as our Savior the Light is never extinguished.

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Memories Haunt in the Light

I stand upon the solid Rock
I’ve found my firm foundation
Living each day in the Light
Being sure of my salvation

I know His words of grace are true
‘Cause I feel them deep in my heart
I rise each day, out into the world
And that’s when the memories start

The sky is blue, the sun is bright
A chill wind stings my face
I should be happy and light, but cold
Triggers thoughts I seem to chase

Like Paul with his thorn, I pray the Lord
Would remove the pain today
“My grace is sufficient,” He replies
As over and over I cry and pray

But what if grace is not enough
As this memory haunts the light
This is when I must trust and believe
To escape the darkness of night

He uses this memory of pain
To teach me compassion and grace
For the bruised and the broken
Haunted by memories of disgrace

He’s made me merciful and kind
This lesson is not meant to destroy
But some days I’d rather be less caring
And remember only love and joy

My Rock remains firm beneath me
In spite of my doubt and fury
His grace will suffice, I rest in His Light
One day this memory He’ll bury

aasignLinda

How Does It Effect You?

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There are four areas that chronic depression will effect you.

  1. Emotions
  2. Thoughts
  3. Physical
  4. Behavior

We need to really visualize the areas in order to understand. This grasp of the facts will not change a thing, but will only give you a sense of what depression is doing to you, or your loved ones.

Some will emphasize one or another. But all four areas play a part in this disease. We may think we can twist around these, but we’ll find we are still trapped by the evil ogre of depression. (And he takes all the prisoners he can.)

We are hostages to this sickness. Depression truly destroys lives and hopes. It comes uninvited, and springs its trap on us. It can immobilize us in an instant.

David knew what it was like to be a hostage of depression. In Psalm 32:3-4 he wrote:

“For when I kept silent, my bones wasted away
    through my groaning all day long.
4 For day and night your hand was heavy upon me;
    my strength was dried up[b] as by the heat of summer.”

Many readers will relate. It carries with it an authenticity of a man that is a dear struggler. His experience, and his willingness to write openly provides us with comfort and understanding.

Paul knew all about depression. He wrote in 2 Corinthians 7:6:

 “But God, who comforts the depressed, comforted us by the coming of Titus;”

Ancient writers called it “the Noonday Demon.” Winston Churchill called his depression, “the black dog.” Both definitions seem spot on.

Christians will ask me whether depression is caused by an evil spirit, or is it biological? I usually answer both. There is strong evidence that it is a mental illness; an illness like any other (e.g. diabetes, or migraines). It can be treated, to a degree, with meds. But there is a spiritual dimension as well requiring “spiritual warfare” on an serious level.

My own meds have helped me greatly. But strong prayer and worship have assisted me just as much. Reading the Psalms are really helpful. I have made the personal discovery that the presence of God is a great way to walk free.

When you’re truly desperate, you will find a way. Of that I’m convinced. I leave with Philippians 1:6:

” And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.”

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