The Lord Jesus has decided to build his kingdom with the broken things of this earth. As men, we are pretty much convinced that we are to build with the strong, the talented, the personable and the winsome. We insist on building with decidedly unbroken people.
But God’s true kingdom (not the one we know of) is inviting the losers! LOSERS! This is most certainly not how we would do it. But it seems that heaven is now filling up with broken people, and He is transforming them into broken [fixed] Christians. His policy of ministry means that He will never “quench a smoking candle, nor break a bruised reed.” He allows for our weaknesses, and loves us through them.
It is the sick who need the physician, not the healthy. God is a competent specialist at transforming the “weakness-wickedness” of our lives. He knows exactly what to prescribe. Sometimes, he will put us on the shelf for a season. Our diet will change, as we learn to feed on the Word. Slowly, spiritual health will come, and we will grow spiritually.
But realize this, that your life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in one pretty, well preserved package. But instead, it is to skid across the finish line sideways, thoroughly used up, worn out, leaking oil, engine smoking and sputtering, and shouting, “Geronimo!” And we will all be there by God’s grace alone.
This brings me comfort. I must confess, I’m not a Ferrari, but a old jalopy.
But Jesus gave her no reply, not even a word. Then his disciples urged him to send her away. “Tell her to go away,” they said. “She is bothering us with all her begging.”
Matthew 15:23, NLT
This is exceptional. Jesus is always engaging people around him. He teaches and preaches, fully energized by the Holy Spirit. He is a veritable hurricane of goodness and love. He heard every request, and healed every disease. But yet. On this occasion he is completely silent.
The woman’s piteous crying,and begging was seemingly ignored. “If Jesus won’t respond to me, I will go to his followers.” She presses, and cajoles. She falls on her knees. Have you ever seen a person truly beg? It is a very disconcerting experience. Yet, Jesus does nothing, in spite of being able to do all things.
She is a Canaanite; a pagan widow, and her daughter was demonized. Curiously, there was a large heathen temple to Eshmun, the Canaanite god of healing, was just three miles down the road. But her desperate cry was for something real. Something authentic and real that would heal her daughter’s affliction. Only Jesus has what she needs.
Jesus is astonishingly silent. He stands and sees, he hears her cries. She is sobbing, clutching at the disciples robes, disheveled and distressed. It was a desperate scene. Very ugly and very sad.
Jesus responds to his disciple’s plea. Then there is something that seems like a negotiation. A protracted conversation with a ‘seemingly’ reluctant Messiah. It is somewhat disturbing as we listen. Jesus seems to treat her callously. I have always been mystified by this, troubled by his behavior. I can only conclude that what he did was necessary in some way.
But the Son of God sees through this.
And then she makes an incredible statement. Jesus is suddenly amazed at her faith in him. This faith is what he has been waiting to see. She may have known despair, but that isn’t enough. Jesus leads her from the edge. Until she moved to a position of belief, nothing will change. Faith seems to change everything. This is key. It isn’t her words that alters things– it is her heart! At that moment, Jesus declares a healing for her daughter. She is now free from the demon’s grip.
So often I have also felt the pressure from the darkness. I am often embattled and driven into a despair that seems to cripple me. But Jesus is waiting for me, to come to him through an unflinching faith. My good works can never, ever be enough. I’m just like a dog, waiting for food under the table. I have little, if any, decorum or sophistication. There is nothing at all, to commend me to him. Nothing at all.
“Our Lord sometimes yet seems to be silent to His people when they cry to Him. To all their earnest supplications He answers not a word. Is His silence a refusal? By no means. Ofttimes, at least, it is meant only to make the suppliants more earnest, and to prepare their hearts to receive richer and greater blessings. So when Christ is silent to our prayers, it is that we may be brought down in deeper humility at His feet, and that our hearts may be made more fit to receive heaven’s gifts and blessings.”
Women experience twice the rate of depression as men.
Women have twice the chances as men
Everyone experiences disappointment or sadness in life. When the “down” times last a long time or interfere with your ability to function, you may be suffering from a common medical illness called depression.
Major depression affects your mood, mind, body and behavior. Nearly 15 million Americans — one in 10 adults — experience depression each year, and about two-thirds don’t get the help they need.
Women experience twice the rate of depression as men, regardless of race or ethnic background. An estimated one in eight women will contend with a major depression in their lifetimes.
Researchers suspect that, rather than a single cause, many factors unique to women’s lives play a role in developing depression. These factors include: genetic and biological, reproductive, hormonal, abuse and oppression, interpersonal and certain psychological and personality characteristics.
Symptoms of depression include:
Little interest or pleasure in doing things
Feeling down, depressed or hopeless
Trouble falling or staying asleep or sleeping too much
Feeling tired or having little energy
Poor appetite or overeating
Feeling bad about yourself, that you are a failure or have let yourself or your family down
Trouble concentrating on things, such as reading the newspaper or watching television
Moving or speaking so slowly that other people could have noticed or the opposite in that you are so fidgety or restless that you have been moving around a lot more than usual
Thoughts that you would be better off dead or of hurting yourself in some way
Women may be more likely to report certain symptoms, such as…
anxiety
somatization (the physical expression of mental distress)
increases in weight and appetite
oversleeping
outwardly expressed anger and hostility
Stay close to your friend
Helping a Woman with Depression
People with depression aren’t the only ones who suffer. Their friends and loved ones may experience worry, fear, uncertainty, guilt, confusion or even be more likely to go through depression themselves.
The situation may be especially trying if your loved one doesn’t realize that she is depressed. You can help by recognizing the symptoms of depression and pointing out that she has changed.
Recognize even atypical signs of depression. Women may be more likely to report certain symptoms, such as anxiety, physical pain, increases in weight and appetite, oversleeping and outwardly expressed anger and hostility. Women are also more likely to have another mental illness-such as eating disorders or anxiety disorders-present with depression, so be alert for depression if you know a woman with a history of mental illness.
To point out these changes without seeming accusatory or judgmental, it helps to use “I” statements, or sentences that start with “I.” Saying “I’ve noticed you seem to be feeling down and sleeping more” sounds less accusatory than “you’ve changed.”
Talking to a Woman with Depression
If a friend or loved one has depression, you may be trying to figure out how you can talk to her in a comforting and helpful way. This may be difficult for many reasons. She is probably feeling isolated, emotionally withdrawn, angry or hostile and sees the world in a negative light.
Although you may feel your efforts are rebuffed or unwelcome, she needs your support. You can simply be someone she can talk to and let her share her feelings.
It’s important to remember that depression is a medical illness. Her symptoms are not a sign of laziness or of feeling sorry for herself. She can’t just “snap out of it” by taking a more positive outlook on life.
Helpful responses include, “I am sorry you’re in so much pain” or “I can’t imagine what it’s like for you. It must be very difficult and lonely.” Instead of simply disagreeing with feelings she conveys, it is more helpful to point out realities and hope.
A woman with depression often expects to be rejected. You can reassure her that you will be there for her and ask if there’s anything you can do to make her life easier.
If your loved one is not diagnosed or not in treatment, the most important thing you can do is encourage her to see a health care professional.
*Never ignore statements about suicide.* Even if you don’t believe your loved one is serious, these thoughts should be reported to your friend’s doctor. If this is an emergency, call 9-1-1.
“Lord, I crawled across the barrenness to you with my empty cup uncertain in asking any small drop of refreshment. If only I had known you better I’d have come running with a bucket.”
-Nancy Spiegelberg
There can be no freedom from condemnation without submission to the saving life of Christ. This is a definite and critical point.
Without a faith in Him, we are left with the option of carrying our own guilt. This is a staggering possibility, and our lives turn to drinking and “drugging” and other things. We must escape from all this pain and sin. We are walking out condemnation, and the weight of this is immense.
Much of our life can be distilled from this viciousness. We absorb it, adapt to it, thinking it will ease up some. But it doesn’t, and it won’t. We turn to all kinds of ‘pain absorbers’ looking to cope with this mindset. There are escapes, and we try them all. But ultimately we end up with one that is quite imperfect, and we ‘sort of’ become a little numb. Our hearts become numb and hard.
Condemnation twists us and who are in Christ.
It deforms our spirit and destroys our confidence before our Father in Heaven. His love is still being poured out, but we have placed a cover on our vessel. We are blocking His mercy by our unwillingness to be forgiven. All of our guilt seems a reasonable reaction to the heaviness of our sin.
Humans were not designed to handle guilt, and its “cousin” fear. When we do try, we short-circuit. Pain is always avoided, and that ends up corralling us into bondage. From here, we can still mentally assent to the Bible; we can still have a sense of spirituality. But it will always be filtered through our sense of condemnation.
Faith in the complete action of Jesus is enough. Because I believe He carried the full weight of my sin, past—-present—future, I can walk out a free man. Yes, sin does require justice, it is to be condemned. But my faith, trust or confidence enables me to separate from the sin that would take me, straight to the bottom.
In this release, we are supposed to live. Freed from every condemnation. You must displace condemnation with grace.
We have the joy of the forgiven sinner, and that really makes no sense at all.
It isn’t at all rational. But it is legal, and it is binding. And permanent. There have been too many lies, for too long. Grace is meant to be the most radical concept we have ever confronted. And truly it is.
“Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.”
Broken Believers 