Category: understanding

A Charlie Brown Kind of a Depression

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As we start to wrestle with our embedded issues, we suddenly realize that the battle is in largely inside.  Maybe the last few days have been hard, and perhaps we sense a dark presence pressing; and we sometimes wonder if we’ll ever see the light again.

How do unbelievers do it?

As a “born-again” believer, I can get deeply challenged by depression, I simply can’t understand any real life outside of my faith in Jesus. The Holy Spirit meets me, holds me, and speaks peaceful things to me.  I’ve been promised things of wonder and of grace.

I’ve discovered that self-pity and discouragement are main ingredients into my excursions through bleakness and sadness.  In my more profound journey’s into darkness, I find myself seeing the physical world around me literally drained of color.  Everything around me is in “black and white.”  (I have been told this is one of many symptoms of depression.)

Charlie Brown seems to hit the proverbial nail on the head.

I sometimes catch myself smiling, and I immediately stop and say, “Wait. I’m very depressed.  I can’t be seen smiling, or enjoying a walk on the beach.” Often we choose to act in ways that reinforces our illness.  We think we have to be a certain way, stand in another, or even walk around like we’re very gloomy people.

Not true. Sometimes depressed people seem to be the happiest.

Depression is very real.  Medication is mandated for many.  But truthfully, I see there’s an perverse element of chosen melancholy.  Our self-pity works hand-in-hand with our image and identity.  It seems we have to be somebody, even if we have to be a crazy person. Weird, I know.

After all, we have to excel at something, don’t we?

I imagine that this blog has been a challenge at times.  I write these daily blogs out of my own attitudes, and issues and problems.  But there is a “Charlie Brown Depression,” the type where we feel like we must be inconsolable all the time.  Just be aware. It’s real.

If while in the pit, and for some reason you think of something that’s funny, go ahead and smile, its okay.  I’m learning that things are never as sad or grim as I think, nor are they rosy and joy saturated either.  Be real.  Be real to yourself.   Walk in the truth.  And if you should–take your meds, lol.

Maybe Mr. Brown should become our new patron saint of lost causes?

“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.”

Jeremiah 29:11

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A Taste of a Poem

 Darkness to Light – A Poem

I have been challenged us to stop hiding behind the masquerade of a perfect life, and share our struggles so that others might benefit from our journey with God. Then yesterday morning, during my prayer time, a poem came to me that shows my own struggles with depression. I decided to share it today.

Darkness to Light

Darkness surrounded me
Darkness invaded my mind
Darkness enveloped my very soul

In the darkness
The evil one whispered
Thoughts that seemed my own
They’d be better off without me
It would be better if I was dead

Tears drowned me
Tears flooded my mind
Tears drenched my very soul

Through the tears
The evil one whispered
Thoughts I believed were true
I am broken beyond repair
These tears will never end

Pain ensnared me
Pain clouded my mind
Pain threatened my very soul

Amplifying the pain
The evil one whispered
Thoughts I was powerless to deny
This pain will forever cripple me
I will never know joy

Then His Light
Pierced through the darkness
Illuminating my soul
Revealing the sin in my mind
Proclaiming the way for me

Forgive He whispered
As I’ve forgiven you
Your darkness will subside
His words are true

Then His Love
Dried all my tears
Infusing my soul with joy
Clarifying truth in my mind
Declaring healing for me

Live He whispered
As I live in you
Your tears will be dried
His words are true

Then His Truth
Erased my pain
Protecting my soul
Clearing lies from my mind
Redeeming me

Love He whispered
As I forever love you
Your pain will be set aside
His words are true

Darkness, tears, and pain
Replaced by my Savior’s
Light, Love, and Truth
Holding me forevermore.

Scriptures to consider…

 3 The cords of death entangled me,
   the anguish of the grave came upon me;
   I was overcome by trouble and sorrow.
4 Then I called on the name of the LORD:
   “O LORD, save me!”

* * * * *

 8 For you, O LORD, have delivered my soul from death,
   my eyes from tears,
   my feet from stumbling,
9 that I may walk before the LORD
   in the land of the living.

Psalm 116 (NIV).

Linda’s blog is at anotherfearlessyear.net. Please check out all she has to say.  

‘Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep’

“Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on Thee.”

Isaiah 26:3

In times of sadness and feeling alone, we have to focus on God, trust Him, and find protection in His love. Remember how John sought his comfort in Jesus’ presence during the darkest night in history? He found his peace by leaning on Jesus’ chest. Simple? Necessary?

John was kept in perfect peace during all those terrible hours.

Everything appeared to have slipped away and there was nothing that seemed safe and solid. But John crept into the shelter of love and simply trusted, and was kept in holy peace.

Evil seemed everywhere that terrible night, but there was one real place of true safety. And John understood.

Jesus will not reject you. Healing broken hearts and minds are His specialty.

Once, while Rudyard Kipling was terribly sick, a nurse overheard him whispering the prayer of his childhood, “Now I lay me down to sleep.” When the nurse interrupted him, Kipling softly replied, “I want my heavenly Father. Only He can care for me now.”

In his great weakness there was nothing that human help could do, and he turned to God and crept into His bosom, seeking the blessing and the care which none but God can give.

That is what we need to do in every time of trial, of sorrow, – when the gentlest human love can do nothing, – creep into our heavenly Father’s bosom, saying, “Now I lay me down to sleep.” That is the way to peace. Earth has no shelter in which it can be found, but in God the feeblest may find it.

 “Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.”

Matthew 11:28

I really hope you find shelter in Jesus, He loves you so much. If you’re overwhelmed and bewildered, He is waiting. Tired and defeated–His arms are open. Just come, expect His grace.

Like John, lean hard on Him. Learn to hide. Draw very close–Jesus will dry your tears and cover you. You’ll be safe there.

“One of His disciples, whom Jesus loved (esteemed), was leaning against Jesus’ chest.”

John 13:23, Amplified Bible

I have a new discipleship teaching site. alaskabibleteacher.com

Always Be Children, [Always]

“At that time the disciples came to Jesus, saying, “Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?” 

“And calling to him a child, he put him in the midst of them 3 and said, “Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.”

Matthew 18:1-3, ESV

I have always believed that maturity brings wisdom and growth, a beautiful journey to embark on. When it comes to spiritual matters, it is an opportunity to delve deeper into the richness of faith. I eagerly embraced the challenge of expanding my understanding and exploring the profound teachings. Jesus’ devoted disciples, too, were presented with invaluable guidance and encouraging direction:

15 “Now they were bringing even infants to him that he might touch them. And when the disciples saw it, they rebuked them. 16 But Jesus called them to him, saying, “Let the children come to me, and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of God. 

17 Truly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child shall not enter it.”

Luke 18:15-17

Jesus makes a special effort to get his followers to see their need. He voices the dictate that they must become children again; that they must learn that the basics are the core. We won’t grow out of them.

Real faith remains childlike even as it gets old.  

As we see the children that are in our midst, we should see in them the pattern for us as we connect with the Lord, and with each other. It’s a paradox, but we mature as children, and this doesn’t ever change. Jesus told us that the Kingdom belongs to those whose faith is childlike.

Childlike faith seems to have three focuses:

  1. Areas of intimacy, coming together in the presence of the Lord as His sons and daughters.
  2. Areas of relationships, between each other as brothers and sisters in love with each other.
  3. Issues of spiritual warfare, facing the daily battle with sin and darkness with a steady awareness of the ones alongside us.

Holding a child’s faith has an extraordinary power to shape our lives in profound ways. It’s a delicate balance of innocence, trust, and vulnerability that leaves an indelible mark on our hearts and souls. The childlike belief in something greater than ourselves and it opens up a world of possibilities and invites us to embrace the wonders of the unknown with open arms.

Our Father is with us.

But what does it truly mean to hold onto a child’s faith? It goes beyond the simple act of believing in something beyond our understanding. It requires a humility that allows us to acknowledge our own limitations and embrace the beauty of our imperfections. In a world that often values strength and self-assuredness, the child’s faith reminds us of the importance of embracing vulnerability and being open to being led in fresh ways.

Picture for a moment the scenario of being suddenly clothed in nothing but our humility. It is a humbling thought, isn’t it? In that state, stripped of all pretenses and facades, we are forced to confront our true selves. We are reminded of our humanity, and our weakness with the swirling world around us. It’s in those vulnerable moments that we truly come to appreciate the depth and power of a child’s faith.

In a society that often prioritizes material success, power, and self-exaltation, we may find ourselves striving to shed our humility in favor of more desirable qualities. However, it’s precisely in cherishing our humility that we can find true wisdom and grow into more compassionate and merciful people. It’s through humility that we can connect with others on a deeper level, understanding their joys and sorrows with a genuine empathy.

Let’s embrace the innocence of a child’s faith.

Let’s allow it to ‘infect’ our lives with a sense of real wonder, curiosity, and a supernatural love. Let’s never forget the lessons it teaches us about the importance of embracing humility in our journey through life.

Let’s hold onto a child’s faith tightly, for within its grasp lies the power to transform our lives and the world around us. May it be a constant reminder of the child-like beauty that exists within each and every one of us.

Humility is the stuff Jesus uses to make a place for His Kingdom.

Becoming a person of childlike faith will take a lifetime, that is why we should stay small and keep growing in our dependence on Him.

“God created the world out of nothing, and so long as we are nothing, He can make something out of us.”  

Martin Luther

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I have a new site at alaskabibleteacher.com