Today I realized that I was sick and very tired of myself. It’s really not disgust or even loathing. It’s more like weariness, exhaustion. I’ve never felt this way. In a strange way, it intrigues me. Could this definite disenchantment mean something spiritual? Does it have value, or am I just feeling self-absorbed or conceited?
There seems to exist a real rigidity to evil, something intense.
I have seen it up close– sin that hardens all who touch it, plain and simple. My growing immobility disturbs me, as I know I’m developing a “hardness of heart.” Atherosclerosis is a condition of a sick heart where arteries become blocked. It’s also known as the “hardening of the heart, or arteries.” It is a patient killer, slowly and surely making hard deposits that block the flow of blood.
The Bible speaks much about having a hard heart.
It also uses the metaphor of fallow ground that must be plowed up. Jesus used the same image in His “Parable of the Sower” in Matthew 13.
“A sower went out to sow. 4 And as he sowed, some seeds fell along the path, and the birds came and devoured them. 5 Other seeds fell on rocky ground, where they did not have much soil, and immediately they sprang up, since they had no depth of soil, 6 but when the sun rose they were scorched. And since they had no root, they withered away. 7 Other seeds fell among thorns, and the thorns grew up and choked them. 8 Other seeds fell on good soil and produced grain.”
There are really only four options.
The first is the seed that gets walked on.
The second lands on hard stones.
The third seed tries to grow in the thorns and thistles.
Only the fourth flourishes.
The Battle of the Heart
I have found that my own heart drifts. I myself struggle with a mental illness where my emotions fluctuate constantly. They gallivant around, floating here and then there. I may be depressed and suicidal in the morning, and then I can be euphoric in the evening. It’s having the identity of a “wandering star.”
But I so want my heart to soften. I want to grow. I really do.
I so want to sit with Jesus and hear His words. I need Him to share what He’s thinking about. Yet I know that any sin I entertain has a hardening effect on my spiritual heart. This scares me. But truly he still holds me close, and he keeps his steady loving hand on me. *
“And don’t build an altar that requires steps; you might expose yourself when you climb up”.
Exodus 20:26
“Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins.”
1 Peter 4:8
While I lived in the SOS Ministry house in the Mission District of San Francisco a dear brother taught me this principle. Living in Christian community is a really wonderful thing. But it also could be a challenge at times. What Michael shared, allowed my understanding to grow to meet the need of the moment.
The principle is this:
We are called to cover up our brother’s nakedness.
Throughout the scripture “being naked, or nakedness” is always a shame. It comes welded to the concept of being vulnerable or exposed to the sight of everyone else. It also carries the idea of sin; it is sin that everyone can see; it is very obvious.
For those of us who often sin, we evolve the idea of keeping a lid on it, and being secretive with it. There will be people who will never know. Often sex sin, drug and alcohol sin, both are kept hidden from view of family and friends, and the Church.
Noah and His Nakedness, Genesis 9
“Noah became a farmer and planted a vineyard. When he drank wine made from his grapes, he became drunk and lay naked in his tent. Ham, the father of Canaan, looked at his naked father and told his brothers outside. Then Shem and Japheth got a coat and, carrying it on both their shoulders, they walked backwards into the tent and covered their father.”
“They turned their faces away so that they did not see their father’s nakedness.”
Genesis 9:20-24
It’s hard to process this patriarch’s gross sin.
However in all fairness Noah had lost everything in the flood, so perhaps we should be gentle with him. On the other hand, people who cover up the nakedness of others seem to be gentle and humble. They would never, ever dream of making a scandal. They are trustworthy and understand to a great degree the things that make a man or woman of God.
Leviticus 18 is the “magnum opus” of nakedness.
We are pretty much told over and over in this chapter, not to ever uncover another. Actually is pretty emphatic and somewhat redundant. But I think the Lord wanted it repeated this way.
Our vulnerabilities are there for all to see. But there are also men and women who go out of their way to protect and shield. They are safe people, in the classic sense of the word. They cover-up, but never in negative or criminal way, but in love and blessing. (If it is a serious crime, the police should be involved.)
Mature believers will step forward and protect the open areas of others.
Quite often we are exposed, open to attack on our weaknesses. Mature believers will step forward and protect the open areas of others. They will refuse to judge or point out sins. But they will stand in the gap, shielding and protecting.
God’s final word on nakedness is in Revelation 3:18, and this is a good place to conclude this post,
“My advice to you is to buy pure gold from me, gold purified by fire—only then will you truly be rich. And to purchase from me white garments, clean and pure, soyouwon’tbenakedand ashamed; and to get medicine from me to heal your eyes and give you back your sight.”
Every now and then, I come across something that will not fit into the scope of Brokenbelievers. This is one of those times. I share it with my brothers and sisters who serve Jesus in any leadership capacity in the Church. I think it’s fitting that this be shared as we step into 2022. These are challenging times to serve him; but not dangerous–at least not yet.
The Prayer of a Minor Prophet was originally written on August 18, 1920. It still means a lot to ordained/non-ordained serving in the ministry. I suppose it still speaks to every leader in every Church. You may want to copy and keep this for those hard times that will come to each of us.Could it be that you might want to share this word with the leaders of your local fellowship?
The article was written on the day of Tozer’s ordination into the ministry.
O Lord, I have heard Thy voice and was afraid. Thou has called me to an awesome task in a grave and perilous hour. Thou art about to shake all nations and the earth and also heaven, that the things that cannot be shaken may remain. O Lord, my Lord, Thou has stooped to honor me to be Thy servant. No man taketh this honor upon himself save he that is called of God as was Aaron. Thou has ordained me Thy messenger to them that are stubborn of heart and hard of hearing. They have rejected Thee, the Master, and it is not to be expected that they will receive me, the servant.
1897-1963
My God, I shall not waste time deploring my weakness nor my unfittedness for the work. The responsibility is not mine, but Thine. Thou has said, “I knew thee – I ordained thee – I sanctified thee,” and Thou hast also said, “Thou shalt go to all that I shall send thee, and whatsoever I command thee thou shalt speak.” Who am I to argue with Thee or to call into question Thy sovereign choice? The decision is not mine but Thine. So be it, Lord. Thy will, not mine, be done.
Well do I know, Thou God of the prophets and the apostles, that as long as I honor Thee Thou will honor me. Help me therefore to take this solemn vow to honor Thee in all my future life and labors, whether by gain or by loss, by life or by death, and then to keep that vow unbroken while I live.
It is time, O God, for Thee to work, for the enemy has entered into Thy pastures and the sheep are torn and scattered. And false shepherds abound who deny the danger and laugh at the perils which surround Thy flock. The sheep are deceived by these hirelings and follow them with touching loyalty while the wolf closes in to kill and destroy. I beseech Thee, give me sharp eyes to detect the presence of the enemy; give me understanding to see and courage to report what I see faithfully. Make my voice so like Thine own that even the sick sheep will recognize it and follow Thee.
Lord Jesus, I come to Thee for spiritual preparation. Lay Thy hand upon me. Anoint me with the oil of the New Testament prophet. Forbid that I should be come a religious scribe and thus lose my prophetic calling. Save me from the curse that lies dark across the modern clergy, the curse of compromise, of imitation, of professionalism. Save me from the error of judging a church by its size, its popularity or the amount of its yearly offering. Help me to remember that I am a prophet – not a promoter, not a religious manager, but a prophet. Let me never become a slave to crowds. Heal my soul of carnal ambitions and deliver me from the itch for publicity. Save me from bondage to things. Let me not waste my days puttering around the house. Lay Thy terror upon me, O God, and drive me to the place of prayer where I may wrestle with principalities and powers and the rulers of the darkness of this world. Deliver me from overeating and late sleeping. Teach me self-discipline that I may be a good soldier of Jesus Christ.
I accept hard work and small rewards in this life. I ask for no easy place. I shall try to be blind to the little ways that could make life easier. If others seek the smoother path I shall try to take the hard way without judging them too harshly. I shall expect opposition and try to take it quietly when it comes. Or if, as sometimes it falleth out to Thy servants, I should have grateful gifts pressed upon me by Thy kindly people, stand by me then and save me from the blight that often follows. Teach me to use whatever I receive in such manner that will not injure my soul nor diminish my spiritual power. And if in Thy permissive providence honor should come to me from Thy church, let me not forget in that hour that I am unworthy of the least of Thy mercies, and that if men knew me as intimately as I know myself they would withhold their honors or bestow them upon others more worthy to receive them.
And now, O Lord of heaven and earth, I consecrate my remaining days to Thee; let them be many or few, as Thou wilt. Let me stand before the great or minister to the poor and lowly; that choice is not mine, and I would not influence it if I could. I am Thy servant to do Thy will, and that will is sweeter to me than position or riches or fame and I choose it above all things on earth or in heaven.
Though I am chosen of Thee and honored by a high and holy calling, let me never forget that I am but a man of dust and ashes, a man with all the natural faults and passions that plague the race of men. I pray Thee, therefore, my Lord and Redeemer, save me from myself and from all the injuries I may do myself while trying to be a blessing to others. Fill me with Thy power by the Holy Spirit, and I will go in Thy strength and tell of Thy righteousness, even Thine only. I will spread abroad the message of redeeming love while my normal powers endure.
Then, dear Lord, when I am old and weary and too tired to go on, have a place ready for me above, and make me to be numbered with Thy saints in glory everlasting. Amen.
AMEN.
Written in 1950, Aiden Wilson Tozer was 23 years old when he was called to pastor a new church in Clarksburg, West Virginia. On August 18, 1920 at a campground a few miles outside Cleveland, Ohio, leaders of the Christian and Missionary Alliance scheduled an ordination service.
After the formal ceremony, Tozer slipped away from the crowd and found a quiet place to be alone with God. He never forgot what he prayed that evening and years later as the new editor for the Alliance Weekly, Tozer published his prayer in an article “For Pastors Only: Prayer of a Minor Prophet” (May 6, 1950).
“Calling his followers to him, Jesus said, “I tell you the truth, this poor widow gave more than all those rich people.”
Mark 12:43, NCV
Heaven uses scales that earth knows nothing about. Jesus calls out to His disciples, and they gather up close. Life has a way of teaching us incredible things. Circumstances usually make the best instructors. These disciples did not need a didactic lecture. They needed an authentic example of how of giving was processed through the economy of heaven.
The widow’s desperate poverty becomes the prime matrix of giving to the Father. Her deposit was miniscule, hardly even enough for Jesus to even acknowledge. Two pennies– laughable at best. Many would give thousands more that day. The widow gave everything she had. The big ticket guys gave a very small precentage from their bank account.
The money box was a place of worship.
Jesus acknowledged what this very poor widow did. Some stood close to money box, and they would evaluate the giving of each one. The text tells us that many came “with large sums of money.” But Jesus declared the “widow’s mite” to be supreme. Her pathetic gift was of a utmost value.
Upside down. The view of heaven has turned everything on it’s head.
Our first impression is almost always wrong. This poor widow has been exalted to a place of example. She now takes the spotlight as the model for us. Jesus makes her his Director of the Treasury for the KoG. Two pathetic pennies! And she becomes an astonishing pattern for us.
Broken Believers 