The Magnificent God: “Getting All In”

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 “If I were you, I would go to God
    and present my case to him.
He does great things too marvelous to understand.
    He performs countless miracles.

Job 5:8-9, New Living Translation

I’m back to reading Job– for the billionth time.  I decided this time, I will muscle through it.  (But I must admit my track record isn’t the greatest.)  I must tell you, the post that follows may not be for you, if your face turns red— stop! Don’t try to read anymore; it’s not for you. Walk away. It’s not worth it.

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These two verses, combined– create a mindset of a bold confidence.  The speaker (not Job the “wonder-guy,” but mere Eliphaz) creates an anticipation of ‘what if?’  His advice, is to turn it over and make it God’s issue.  Let Him deal with it, it is his job.  Lay these issues on his doorstep, ring his door-bell, and run away quick.

But the speaker goes right to the source– revealing a definite purpose.  People like this are uncommon, more or less rare.  But we admire them for it, after all it gives us ‘slackers’ a warm, fuzzy feeling as we gaze on their zeal.  But human solutions will rarely bring out a righteousness of God.  We see them, admire them, want to be like them… but guess what?  It fizzles out into an embarrassed realization as we start to understand; this isn’t going to work after all.

But we must bring our problems to Him.  I will not try to minimize this point.  We are not built to carry such loads.  We weren’t designed to do this.  We approach Him (with some trepidation, if we are reasonably sane) with these ugly and heavy burdens.  But we don’t ring His doorbell and run. Rather we stand to meet Him, face-to-face.

“God does wonders that cannot be understood; 
he does so many miracles they cannot be counted.” 

Verse 9 speaks out of a reflective and knowing heart.  The speaker understands that God works miracles; He has the “ultimate track record.” He does the outrageous; He does things that no one else can do! He is like a magician– wonders happen. The speaker grasps something here.  The God who he seeks is a miracle-working God.  He is so utterly convinced of this fact that he brings it before Job as a ‘plan-of-action.’

And what can we say?  I think there is a lot of ignorance among some who call themselves “believers.”  We catch a fleeting glimpse of His Glory, and suddenly we launch a ministry and a “speaking tour.”  In our very brief encounter with Him we suddenly become either theologians, or talk-show hosts of the religious persuasion (of course, on TV).

There are no crispy clean answers, but as we humbly, and seek Him brokenly– without any aggrandizement or posturing, He will work.  But we must deal with our own urge for “hucksterism” or a feeble manipulation.  It can’t, and won’t work, at least not the way we think it will.

Connecting with Him is not super hard, but it will cost us everything we have. When it is truly real, you will know it by a price that must be paid.

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When You’re Out of Control (A Reblog from 2013)

Originally written August 29, 2013 and shared today hoping it will bless someone.


 

“I’m must show myself; things are not going well, to be honest.  I’m becoming more and more fragmented.  And I can’t seem to hold it together.  Essentially, I mentally can’t keep it centered on the things I know are right and appropriate. My mind is in a muddle, and my heart is not far behind.

I can’t go on like this.  I have to confess that I’m spinning out of control.  There are too many issues that hammer me, without any resolution or finality.  I need a “booster shot” of grace. (Perhaps, maybe an I.V. would be better.)

All I want is to escape, and to shake off these ‘parasites’ that sap me of any strength I might generate.  Far too many things are draining me of any vitality and hope.  Despair and despondency have suddenly shown up at my door, but I treat them as unwelcomed visitors, and hope they will leave me alone.  All they want to do is take me apart, and dismantle me, and I seldom advance beyond this. I haven’t invited them.

This simple blog has kept me going.  The posts that I write are sincere, and I know for a fact they touch many hearts.  I’m astonishingly grateful for this.  But they can’t minimize my own issues.  I am constantly on the edge, a step one way or another could push into a desperate fall. (Funny, I’m starting to scare myself.)

I have a deep confidence in Jesus.  I believe that he loves me in the most intense way possible.  I trust in his deliberate and careful love.  Resting in his arms is the very best thing I could do.  He is the only one who can lead me through my mental illness.  Or to give me the grace to move above it.

I do not want to offend or alienate anyone.  That simply is not what I am about.  But I simply can not try to take Brokenbelievers much further in this ‘frame of mind.’  I will try to post as often as I can– but both my therapist and psychiatrist want me to go into a hospital.  I have already been there several times and I do not want to be admitted any time soon.

The next several days should be interesting.  I’m definitely committed to avoiding hospitalization.  The “professionals” I trust are trying to commit me, but I do intend to make a scrap of it.  “I will not go lightly.”

Please try to be patient with me.  I want to post, it runs through my veins.  But I simply don’ t  have the resources that extend into transparency and clarity.  Please forgive me. There’s is no way I can make this work without avoiding a “shutdown.” We will see.

***

kyrie elesion, Bryan

(Lord, have mercy on us.)

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Suffering That Baffles Us

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”Sometimes it takes a long, long time before we can glean enrichment from the deprivation and suffering which has baffled and overwhelmed us.”

Mildred Tengbaum

Seldom do puzzles solve themselves. Jigsaw puzzles especially. We sit at the table turning the pieces over, separating the “edges” to start. It’s slow going; we look at the picture on the box, looking at what we’re trying to put together. Nothing really helps, and it is slow going, even for someone who is experienced in puzzle solving.

It can take a long time to put it together. You’ll probably require the “patience of Job” in order to manage it. The puzzle makers design them to challenge, not to solve. There is kind of a “grinding out” involved. Pieces that look like they may fit, but don’t.

In life we go through trials. We’re challenged– sometimes beyond our limits. Testing can be extreme sometimes and we don’t know how we’re going to survive. It seems “the odds are against us.” In the book of Psalms there are many encouraging promises, here are just a few:

“I am not afraid of ten thousand enemies
    who surround me on every side.”
Psalm 3:6, NLT
“Though a mighty army surrounds me,
    my heart will not be afraid.
Even if I am attacked,
    I will remain confident.”
Psalm 27:3
“The Lord is for me, so I will have no fear.
    What can mere people do to me?”
Psalm 118:6

The Psalms aren’t for those who have it all together. (They don’t need them). Rather, these psalms are for the burned-out, the afflicted, the scared and desperate. We “own” these.

Life in general, is impossible without God. Our issues are leading us back to Him, and so they serve His purpose. I thank God for my mental illness. Depression leads me to seek Him with a whole heart. What was meant to destroy me, works out to my good.

Oh, I slapped the following together:

Tips for the puzzles of life.

  1. Separate the pieces into groups.
  2. “Edge” pieces go first.
  3. Consult the picture on the box repeatedly.
  4. Take a break when the pieces all look a like.
  5. Get help. A fresh set of eyes can be a blessing.

I hope Brokenbelievers.com is a blessing to you. “We aim to please.”

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Bipolar Disorder– Basic Stuff

 

If you have bipolar disorder, you may recognize many below. Not everyone has exactly the same symptoms. Talk with your healthcare provider about your symptoms at each visit.

  • Feeling sad or blue, or “down in the dumps”
  • Loss of interest in things you used to enjoy, including sex
  • Feeling worthless, hopeless, or guilty
  • Sleeping too little or too much
  • Changes in weight or appetite
  • Feeling tired or having little or no energy
  • Feeling restless
  • Problems concentrating or making decisions
  • Thoughts of death or suicide

 

Symptoms of mania may include:

  • Increased energy level
  • Less need for sleep
  • Racing thoughts or mind jumps around
  • Easily distracted
  • More talkative than usual or feeling pressure to keep talking
  • More self-confident than usual
  • Focused on getting things done, but often completing little
  • Risky or unusual activities to the extreme, even if it’s likely bad things will happen

Here are some behaviors that may be seen in people with bipolar disorder. Please note some of these behaviors may also indicate a different problem, so proper diagnosis is important.

  • Agitation
  • Alcohol or drug abuse
  • Irritability
  • Excessive gambling
  • Violence
  • Poor judgment with decisions
  • Careless spending, buying sprees
  • Talking about hurting oneself
  • Risky sex or change in sexual activity
  • Impulsive financial investments
  • More arguments
  • Change in energy level, appetite, or sleep pattern
  • Relationship problems at home or work
  • Mounting debt
  • Drinking or drugging for ‘escape’ or maintenance purposes
  • Legal/criminal issues
Visit http://www.webmd.com/depression/guide/bipolar-disorder-manic-depression for more detailed information about bipolar disorder and its symptoms.

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