Pushing Back the Darkness

 

You, LORD, are my lamp; the LORD turns my darkness into light. 2 Sam. 22:29

You, LORD, keep my lamp burning; my God turns my darkness into light. Psalm 18:28

Your eye is the lamp of your body. When your eyes are healthy, your whole body also is full of light. But when they are unhealthy, your body also is full of darknessLuke 11:34

The night is nearly over; the day is almost here. So let us put aside the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light. Romans 13:12

For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light. Ephesians 5:12

There exists a preponderance of scriptural weight in dealing directly with our relationship with darkness and the light.  Darkness is an evil presence.  As believers we must reject the darkness, and turn into the light.  We look directly at Him and we will find our salvation.

But there is a great deal of confusion.  But the entire concept of light over darkness opens our eyes to all that is good, and its worthy of a second look. But evil will insist on its darkness, and we in turn will push it aside.  God doesn’t dwell in darkness, neither should we.

When the blackness pursues us, we must turn and meet its presence.  It must only advance to the place where light meets it.  It cannot advance any closer.  When the time is right, we must push against its evil.  Darkness will never inherit a thing from the children of light.

When we turn to our Father, nothing can touch us.  We are teflon.  We press against darkness and it folds up.  It is an illusion and nothing more.  We shouldn’t be fearful or intimidated by the way it posturea and preens.  There is not a thing there, unless we buy into its foolish pretending.

Darkness will be forever pushed into a corner against our light. We should expect a push back.  But it holds no weight, and has no real significance.  We push back and he folds up.  Actually it is hardly a process and more a rout.  The light will shine and we will move into the place we are have been ordained for.

We take this place that the Father has made for us.  We will no longer be intimidated by a circulating evil.  We step out and the light meets us.  We push against darkness and it has to accommodate us.  He has made it so our hearts are only receptive to grace and light.

We can be touched by nothing except through His cross.

ybic, Bryan

 

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The Hours

When clinical depression is “on-the-clock” it can be sheer agony. It resists and lingers, sometimes for days and days. (It can last for months if untreated.) But it seems that it is these “hours” that are scarcely endurable. It’s truly all this “wasted” time that can seem most unbearable to the afflicted.

“I was mute and silent,
I refrained even from good,
And my sorrow grew worse.”

–Psalm 39:2, NASB

Depressed people tend to suffer in silence and isolate themselves from the outside world. When you’re depressed, you feel less motivated to go out, make contact, socialize or participate in activities, or doing anything at all. It’s all you can do just to get out of bed.

Days, even weeks can go by without wanting to see anyone or talk to anyone. This aggravates feelings of isolation. Often depressed people do not want to talk about their problem or simply feel misunderstood.

Similarly, prolonged and intense feelings of depression can lead to loneliness. Treating the symptoms of depression may help resolve the problem but it isn’t a sure thing. Finding good relationships can push you out of a depression. Loneliness often fuels my depression. Find understanding friends that you can talk with.

unbelieving-believersBeating depression or loneliness does not start with having more friends, or a relationship, although it can help. It really starts from within and is a process that takes time and care. We can be tempted to scrap friendships because they’re a lot of work. But they maybe one of the keys to healing. Experience has taught me that humans go through life in patterns. (We ‘ll do the same thing over and over again.) Even in different situations, these patterns will be repeated and simply generate the same results. A friend can be a new and strategic solution to breaking free.

It is a good thing to know that Jesus Christ sees and understands. 

But it’s also good to have someone with “skin on.”  Someone you can see and touch.  That’s precisely why we have the Church.  People who believe and touch each other deeply, helping each other up.  Depression does not do very well in the true Body of Christ.

“Brethren, even if anyone is caught in any trespass, you who are spiritual, restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness; each one looking to yourself, so that you too will not be tempted. Bear one another’s burdens, and thereby fulfill the law of Christ.”

Galatians 6:1-2

Dear broken believer, take solace in the people in the church. Learn to confide with those who understand. Sometimes I wonder if God has arranged my mental illness so that I will reach out to others. Perhaps He allows it to bless His Church?

“The church is not a select circle of the immaculate, but a home where the outcast may come in. It is not a palace with gate attendants and challenging sentinels along the entrance-ways holding off at arm’s-length the stranger, but rather a hospital where the broken-hearted may be healed, and where all the weary and troubled may find rest and take counsel together.” 

–James H. Aughey

aabryplain

 

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The Ugly Ducklings

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Illustration by Vilhelm Pedersen, Andersen‘s first illustrator

An old fairy tale came crashing through my study this morning. Perhaps you can remember it, “The Ugly Duckling”  by Hans Christian Andersen.

Now I don’t think about children’s stories very often. I regard my thinking about them to be a bit of an anomaly, and certainly not everyday fare. Maybe it should be a more regular occurance. CS Lewis once wrote,Some day you will be old enough to start reading fairy tales again.” I think he might be right.

“The Ugly Duckling” is a story about an homely little bird raised by a flock of ducks in a barnyard. He doesn’t really fit in and can’t ever seem to master being a duck. He is clumsy and ungainly and rather strange looking.  He is abused or ignored by his companions. He doesn’t fit.

You see, he is a swan. He can’t seem to fit in with the other ducklings. He really doesn’t belong. He tries hard to make it work, but his best efforts at being a duck are doomed to failure. It isn’t who he is. He isn’t a duckling, he is cynget.

“For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, in order that he might be the firstborn among many brothers.”

Romans 8:29, ESV

You see, you are different. And you can’t fit in. We have a different destiny than those who surround us. We are “swans” and we can’t change who we really are. (Some try, but to no avail).

“And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect.”

Romans 12:2

We are the ugly duckling who will never fit in. The transformation takes time, but to the amazement of his “friends, he becomes what he was meant to be all along.

Brokenbeliever, try to understand– once you accepted Christ as your Savior, you began to be transformed. You are now a “new creation.” You will never fit in.

“This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!”

2 Corinthians 5:17, NLT

This is a miracle that the world can’t grasp. It is the spiritual makeover that defies any explanation or reasoning. You have become a swan, the most “graceful” of all creatures.

ybic, Bryan

 

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Sorting Out What is Real

It’s a windy cold, gray day here in Alaska.  Very typical for November up here in “the Last Frontier.” Just as typical  is that I have had a heaviness descend on me, (just like when the fat kid sits on the little kid at the bus stop.)

But this onslaught of present grayness seems to be a premonition, I feel, of what I face trying to survive through another long Alaskan winter, (and I don’t know if  I’m going to make it this year.)

Oddly enough, I’ve been thinking about ecosystems and symbiosis How the trees in a forest touch each other with their roots.  The big tree in the sun, “shares” with the little tree in the shade.  It’s the way they gently touch each other– helping, and encouraging and strengthening.

The Church is very much like this.  As a mentally ill believer, I have a lot of needs and weaknesses.  But knowing this, I draw from what God supplies by means of fellowshipping with others, and prayer, and the Word. (FYI.  I’m not good at any of the three.) But I guess I am planted in a good spot.

I think that when we finally make it to eternity, we will be interlaced with each other to the extent we really aren’t sure who is us, and who are our loved ones and our Christian ‘brothers and sisters.’  One thing is certain–we’re not going to survive the journey alone.  We just can’t do it on our own.

I must keep myself rooted firmly into “today”.  I can’t handle tomorrow’s sorrow today.  I have a special friend who believes he has to live “moment-to-moment”.  He says that this helps him navigate the hopelessness and the despair from depression.  One day at a time, and pace myself.  This, and perhaps, be just a little more gentle with myself? Maybe?

An interesting thought, not sure who said it, but it seems true:

“There are places in the heart that do not yet exist; suffering has to enter in for them to come to be.” 

The transformational reason is that we grow after we hurt, that pain endured will change us.  I think this is what God has intended to happen.  (Good thing, not to waste our sorrows.  After all, we’ve already earned them.)

kyrie elesion, Bryan

(Lord, have mercy)
 
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