Category: difficulties

Seeing the Real Thing, [Heroes]

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“All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort. 4 He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us. 5 For the more we suffer for Christ, the more God will shower us with his comfort through Christ. 6 Even when we are weighed down with troubles, it is for your comfort and salvation!”

2 Corinthians 1:3-6

“Grace is given to heal the spiritually sick, not to decorate spiritual heroes”

–Martin Luther

I don’t know if I have ever met a Medal of Honor recipient, and somehow I’m sure that I would’ve remembered.  I most certainly have not met ‘a spiritual hero’.  I imagine them however to be quite dynamic, gushing over with humility and love.  Somewhat like being a ‘Superman of the Soul’.

Through His Holy Spirit, we were chosen not because we are superheroes, but because we are sick.  God doesn’t inspect us for exceptional qualities that we may someday possess.  Instead He is a paramedic, intervening with grace and mercy in our distress and helping us in our desperation.

Perhaps, there are some who secretly want to be ‘decorated’.  They love the attention and covet glory.  Faith is not really a medicine; it is more like a decoration.  It pins on its chest the Medal of Honor.  The highest award you can receive–the holy medallion of faith (with oak leaf clusters, of course).

Having had lived for a few years in a ‘third world country’,  I’ve gotten to observe up close believers who are pathetically poor.  I have seen poverty crush people like a boy crushes a bug on the sidewalk.  The sense I have can be summed up in a phrase, a ‘desperate gratitude’ for His grace.

Jesus has come and gathered up all their sin and shame and evil, and carried it away from them.  Their walk with Him now is in gratitude, not in attainment.  Here in the USA that ‘seeing’ has become myopic.  We struggle to see clearly.  Actually, we can be almost dangerous if we don’t see this.

We cannot envision anything clearly without an adjustment to our eyes.  There has to be a desperation that moves in and heals us.  Something that will pull our faith like a magnet.

We are not collecting ‘merit badges’, but medication and rolled-up bandages.  We hurt– our friends and family hurt, people we haven’t met yet, hurt.

“The mercies of God make a sinner proud, but a saint humble.”   Thomas Watson

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Pondering Brokenness, [Acceptance]

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Broken Fresco– Assisi, Italy

Many voices tell me that there must be distinct lines between sinners (like, me) and Church people. These borders keep order and provide security to those on the ‘inside’ of our Faith. This seems more from a reaction to control than actual sin.

But there are so many people with mental illness: Depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, addictions, PTSD, and many others. We are truly an afflicted people.

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Fitting in isn’t always easy

“Most of the verses written about praise in God’s Word were voiced by people faced with crushing heartaches, injustice, treachery, slander, and scores of other difficult situations.” 

—Joni Eareckson Tada

There needs to be an adjustment to the status quo. Room must be made for the ‘losers’ and the misfits. These are people for whom Christ died. They are special to God.

According to federal  law, buildings must be accessible to the handicapped. Special signs are placed in the parking lots, for special parking and wheelchair ramps need to be installed. This is well and good. But let’s extend this ‘deliberateness’ to those with other needs as well.

“The power of the Church is not a parade of flawless people, but of a flawless Christ who embraces our flaws. The Church is not made up of whole people, rather of the broken people who find wholeness in a Christ who was broken for us.”

–Mike Yaconelli

I encourage you to become proactive when it comes to “opening up” the Church to include ‘the brokenness of the other.’ Even a smile can make the difference to the down-trodden soul. Love the unlovely,  just like Jesus.

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Please Shut the Door, [Prayer]

“When you pray, go into a room alone and shut the door. Pray to your Father in private. He knows what is done in private, and he will reward you.”

Matthew 6:6, CEV

“We are to be shut out from men, and shut in with God.”

Andrew Murray

Prayer is a deep and awesome thing.  And yet in a sense our physical life must have cheeseburgers and spaghetti.  Food powers us, and we are fueled by it’s energy.  Prayer is also necessary to propel us, for it is our spirit’s nourishment.

We cannot survive without food. We see pictures of emaciated children in some African country, and they are just  skin and bones.  It is a sick evil.  But there are Christians who are like this spiritually.  They are starving because they are not praying.

Jesus told His followers, to go into a room alone.  Then shut the door.  We must learn that God is in the secret.  If we should meet with Him, we must be as secretive.  “Shut the door,”  what happens in there is not for public display. We must be quite discrete in our times with Him.

When I was at in my first year at Bible school, I heard a guest speaker teach from Matt. 6:6.  I was pumped up by it, praying with the door shut was a new idea for me.  When I got to my dorm room, I went straight for my closet to put this new revelation into action. Kneeling there in the closet, with the door slid shut, I tried to pray.  And after a bit I fell asleep, still on my knees.

About an hour later I woke up with a start.  I had no idea where I was, and in my disorientation I slid open the closet door with a loud bang.  I tried to stand, but my legs couldn’t support me.  I lurched out in the room and fell in a pile.  My roommate was startled to say the least.  He had been in the room studying quietly by himself, when suddenly this ‘wildman’ burst out of the closet and immediately collapsed.  It was hysterical!

So much for my first attempt at praying in secret.

The quest for spiritual growth will have to lead us into the closet.

The injunction to close the door can be understood in a variety of ways.  The act of isolating ourselves is a physical one.  But we must understand we need to shut up all our social entanglements and obligations.  We isolate ourselves so we can be intimate with Him.

We just need to figure out just how we are to do this.  We shouldn’t give up when it doesn’t bring wondrous results.  We are all students in this, we will advance at times, and then retreat.  But every second in the closet can be an intimate blessing to our souls.

“He that loveth little prayeth little; he that loveth much prayeth much.” 

– Augustine

 

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The Presence Makes the Difference

jesus-paralyticI once was told that depression is the inability to construct a future. Perhaps that is precisely where I’ve come to, this old despair that lies dormant until the conditions are just right— and then it explodes in burst of black dandelions.

For about three weeks, I had experienced being down. Somedays were much worse than others (and some where actually reasonable). I should of been more cautious. Afterall, I have twenty years of battling this old dragon that has been my most potent enemy. I suppose I got a bit arrogant. I know I felt immune.

I laid in bed, unable to get out for days. Obviously this was a concern, but I couldn’t find any strength to speak of. I couldn’t even pray.

 “A few days later, when Jesus again entered Capernaum, the people heard that he had come home. 2 They gathered in such large numbers that there was no room left, not even outside the door, and he preached the word to them.3 Some men came, bringing to him a paralyzed man, carried by four of them.4 Since they could not get him to Jesus because of the crowd, they made an opening in the roof above Jesus by digging through it and then lowered the mat the man was lying on. 5 When Jesus saw their faith, he said to the paralyzed man, “Son, your sins are forgiven.”

Mark 2:1-5

There maybe some who wondered about the sins of this paralyzed man. I believe I may know:

  • There were sins of despair—of God’s goodness.
  • There would’ve been despondency of an unchanging future.
  • And finally, anger at God’s decision to leave him paralyzed and a burden to his family and friends.

That paralyzed man was carried by his friends, and brought into Jesus’ presence. And that is exactly what happened to me. I’ve been astounded by those who carried me. This man had no strength on his own; he was “jello on a mat.” (I don’t mean to be crude or unfeeling).

My own tiredness lingers, I’m struggling to pray. I’m too unfocused, but I’ve been told that comes with the territory with the aftermath of a total depressive meltdown. But I know Jesus. It is His touch that I must have now.

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